Don't Wait

We are a vanishing mist.

Month: April 2020

A Prayer of Protection For Your Family

April 23, 2020 /

I absolutely hate the damage that I see happenng to so many around me.  No matter how much people are trying to stay in touch, disconnection is happening.  Online church services are great.  Zoom meetings are serving their purpose (sort of).  Facetime calls allow some connection.  But, face to face, human interaction can never be replaced.  I’m still so bothered at the thought of people dying alone.  I’m sad for parents who have to send their children into hospitals all by themselves (this happened to a friend and it wasn’t even COVID-19 related).  I hurt for families who are unable to visit sick loved ones.  I personally know of people who have recently died from natural causes (totally unrelated to the virus) and friends and families are unable to grieve together due to social distancing. Instead, meals, cards, and flowers are being left on porches as they talk to and cry with their loved ones from at least 6 feet away. Those who live alone are desperately lonely.  People are feeling desperate because they’ve lost their job and have no clue how they’ll feed their families.  Suicides are beginning to occur because people are scared, lonely, and feel hopeless.  I recently heard the story of a 99 year old man who committed suicide because he felt our current circumstances signified the end of time and he couldn’t bear to see the end result.  Imagine that.  He lived NINETY-NINE YEARS.  NINETY-NINE!!!  Can you imagine the things he had lived through and the things he had seen?  Yet, fear overtook him.  I’m afraid we will see more and more of this in the days and months to come.  I’m fearful of the psychological damage that is being done to people all across the world.

So, what can we do to combat this?  How can we protect our children?  How can we fight back against the fear, depression, anxiety, and hopelessness?  For my family, I’ve been using Psalm 91.  I think many people have been reading this Psalm as a cry for physical protection which is great.  The Lord has impressed on me, though, to pray this for my family for spiritual protection.  Ephesians 6:12 (NIV) says, “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”  We have an enemy who is on the prowl.  He is walking around like a roaring lion seeking to devour us (1 Peter 5:8).  He WANTS us to feel despair.  He WANTS us to be depressed.  He enjoys watching us suffer.  He loves the hopelessness that many people are feeling presently.  We MUST be on guard.  Mommas, pray for your husbands and babies (no matter how old they are).  Daddies, pray for your wife and children.  Personalize Psalm 91 and pray this over your household.  

1 We who dwell in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty.

2 We will say to you Lord, “Our refuge and our fortress, our God in whom we trust.”

3 For you will deliver us from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence.

Let me stop right there.  With all that our world is facing right now, we, of course, read “deadly pestilence” and think coronavirus.  But, can I tell you something?  Yes, God CAN protect us from earthly things such as disease.  He never promised that He will, though.  Instead, the deadly pestilence I think of here is Satan’s schemes, spiritual harm.  God will absolutely protect us and deliver us from the things that can harm us spiritually.  And THAT’S what matters.  That’s where our hope lies.  

4 You will cover us with your pinions, and under your wings we will find refuge; and your faithfulness is a shield and buckler.

5 We will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day,

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.

We will not fear the pestilence.  I was looking at the commentary “Barnes’ Notes on the Bible,” and this is what he said about the phrase “the pestilence that stalks in darkness” (Psalm 91:6)  (think of the coronavirus as you read this).  “Not that it particularly comes in the night, but that it seems to creep along as if in the night; that is, where one cannot mark its progress, or anticipate when or whom it will strike. The laws of its movements are unknown, and it comes upon people as an enemy that suddenly attacks us in the night.”  Sound familiar?  I’ve heard countless people say that this virus can be anywhere at any time and we will obviously have no clue because we cannot see it.  We have no clue whom it will strike next.  But, we cannot fear it because it cannot take our souls.  Our souls are what matter and spiritually, God has us covered with His wings.  

7 A thousand may fall at our side, ten thousand at our right hand, but it will not come near us.

8 We will only look and see the recompense of the wicked.

Think of that!  Satan is hurling thoughts of fear at our families.  He’s heaving the idea of hopelessness at us.  But, through God’s protection, he cannot come near us.  We will only look and see what he’s trying, but he will simply fall by our side.

9 Because we have made you, Lord, our dwelling place – the Most High, who is our refuge – 

10 no evil shall be allowed to befall us, no plague come near our tent.

Once again, this is not saying that we will never suffer physical harm.  A relationship with God does not ensure us an easy, pain free life.  It’s actually quite the opposite.   Though He loves us,  adores us, He allows pain.  Actually, BECAUSE he loves and adores us, He allows pain.  This pain perfects us, refines us, makes us more like Christ.  Instead, the plague that will not come near our tent is Satan.  The next time he tries to whisper lies to you, remember that when we dwell in the shelter of God and call Him our refuge, our fortress, our God, he cannot befall us.

11 For you will command your angels concerning us to guard us in all our ways.

12 On their hands they will bear us up, lest we strike our foot against a stone.

13 We will tread on the lion and the adder, the young lion and the serpent we will trample underfoot.

14 Because we hold fast to you in love, you will deliver us; You will protect us because you know our name.

He knows your name!  The creator of the universe knows your name.  He commands His angels to guard your thoughts and your mind.  Pray this for your family that you will be protected from that which can harm you spiritually.

15 When we call to you, you will answer us; You will be with us in trouble; You will rescue us and honor us.

16 With long life you will satisfy us and show us your salvation.

Think about the long life He will give us.  Once again, we aren’t looking with our human eyes, but instead with our spiritual eyes.  My dad was an amazing Christian man and the Lord saw fit to take him at the age of 37.  He didn’t live a long life here on earth.  The long life He will give us is in our heavenly home.  We are just passing through here.  The burdens of this world are only momentary when compared to eternity.

I copied this Psalm in my journal and have been praying it over our family every single day.  Here is the prayer I wrote at the bottom of the page:

“Lord, please hear us.  Protect us.  And not necessarily physically.   Pray we’ll all have our eyes on you and only you.  We can’t look at everything around us.  

Protect us spiritually.  I’m not concerned with physical – no matter what happens, I know eternity is all that matters.  I pray that all six of us plus future spouses and generations to come will follow you and YOU ALONE.  I do not fear physical threats.  Protect us, though, from spiritual threats.”

God’s desire is to cover us with His feathers. He wants to be our shield and buckler.  I encourage you to pray against the possible psychological effects that this period in history can have on your family.  Fear, despair, depression, and hopelessness are what Satan wants us to feel.  But, we have the HOPE and PROMISE of our God who will use all things for our good and who will answer us and be with us in trouble.  Keep your eyes on Him.  Don’t look to the right or to the left.  Ask Him to protect your family both spiritually and mentally.  And whatever you do, DON’T WAIT!

25 Years of Friendship and Counting

April 15, 2020 /
2001

Do you have a friend or friends that you can really confide in?  Someone that you know will not repeat the things that you tell them?  I believe that everyone needs at least one such person. We need someone who will listen, speak into our lives, and pray for us.  God has surrounded me with an amazing group of women that I am blessed to call friends. I can actually look at each one and can tell exactly how God uses her in my life.  Some can call me out when needed because they aren’t afraid to speak truth into my life. Some are problem solvers and can help me figure certain issues out. Some are good listeners and will just let me talk while I process through life.  Some can make me laugh until my sides hurt and forget for a brief period of time that life can be tough. And some support me and pray for me while protecting my innermost thoughts without any judgment. In this post, I am featuring 2 such friends.  Let me give you a little backstory first.

In 1995, my husband of only a year was transferred to a new town in Virginia.  He had completed a two year program with his employer and was sent to a new location as a supervisor at a manufacturing plant.  I loved our new home and was ecstatic to be living in a town where my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins lived. This was the first time I had ever lived near that side of my family, so I was beyond thrilled.  The move was exciting until about 6 months in when I started to feel really lonely. Every time I’ve ever moved, the 6 month mark is always the hardest. That’s about the time that the excitement of a new place starts to wear off and I begin to need friends.  I’m the type of person that needs at least a few deep relationships in my life. I need girlfriends that I can call and chat with or that I can meet for lunch. I need girls that I can share my life with, bounce ideas off of, and who will support me in prayer when needed.  I began to pray and ask God for a close friend. He answered that prayer in a pretty cool way.

I first met Paula at church and we hit it off instantly.  She was enjoyable and easy to talk to and get to know. She was single, so she had free time in the evenings and weekends to hang out.  We would spend many hours on the phone just talking about whatever came to mind.  

Shortly after meeting Paula, I met Amy.  Amy was a bit more on the quiet and serious side (at least at first), but was also easy to talk to and always seemed genuinely interested in what I had to say.  I actually remember exactly where I was when I met her because she made such a big impression on me. She was married to Tim who got along well with my husband and they were an incredibly fun couple to hang out with. Many of our Friday or Saturday nights (and other nights in between) were spent hanging out and laughing with them along with Paula and her younger brother (he would always come along so that she didn’t feel like the fifth wheel).  By the middle of 1996, I realized that God had answered my prayer for a close friend by not only giving me Paula but by giving me Amy, also.

Paula’s wedding day

We were fortunate to attend a church with several other young couples (many who were not yet married but were dating or engaged) and there eventually was a whole core group of us who got close quickly.  We shared many life experiences with them all. Paula met her husband and got married. All of the other couples got engaged and married and soon we were all starting our families. We went to bridal showers, baby showers, Christmas parties, and birthday parties.  We were in a great place in life surrounded by a solid group of friends. In 2001, though, we knew that God was moving us to a new place. We said goodbye to our friends and moved on to our next step in our journey.

Over the years, we have stayed in touch with Paula and Craig, Amy and TIm, and all of our other friends from church.  We try to have a reunion with them every few years and can always pick up right where we left off. My relationship with Paula and Amy, though, has remained much deeper. The three of us have a text thread that is used just about every day.  We know the ins and outs of each other’s lives, from the trivial things in life to the dark, heavy things. These girls have celebrated victories with me and have walked through some extremely hard times with me. Everyone needs a Paula and/or Amy in their life.  Let me share a few things that I have learned from my 25 year friendship with Paula and Amy.

Left photo: The girls at a reunion in 2013
Middle photo: The guys in 2013
Right photo: The girls in 2018

We must be selective in whom we let speak into our lives.  Both Paula’s and Amy’s faith runs deep, so I know that any advice I get from them is sound advice. Sharing our deepest secrets with people who are negative or who will not point us to Truth can be very damaging.  

We must be careful with whom we share the intimate details of our lives.  I know for certain that whatever I tell Paula and Amy will go no further. I can trust them with anything that I tell them.  I do not worry about them gossiping or sharing things I’ve told them with others. I know that many of the things that I tell them will go with them to their grave.  THAT is a true friend.

We need friends who will pray for us.  Prayer definitely changes things. On my rough days, I can send a text to Paula and Amy and I know they will pray for me.  In the matter of no time, I can feel their prayers because God hears us and just wants us to ask for help.

This next point I feel very strongly about.  We must have friends who show grace and not judgement, especially as we share details about our husbands and children.  Proverbs 31:11-12 says, “The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”  If I am blabbing my mouth about Earl and my children when I am frustrated with them (and oftentimes I am the one who needs the heart change, not them), they will no longer trust me and I will definitely not be doing them good.  I know that no matter what, Paula and Amy will love Earl and my kids and their view of them will not change. I would advise you, too, to be very choosy in whom you discuss your marriage and children with. Our goal should never be to smear our spouse’s and children’s name in the mud, but instead to seek Godly counsel while protecting their integrity.

Paula and Amy, I am so, so thankful for your friendship.  It’s such a joy to share in the successes and struggles of your lives.  I love watching you both grow and having a sounding board as our children are approaching adulthood.  I look forward to the coming years as we navigate the next phases of life. It gives me peace to know our friendship will last a lifetime. 

Dear readers, this life is hard!   If you already have a friend like Paula and Amy, be sure to tell them how much their friendship means!  Remember, life is short. Don’t Wait!!! Then, head to my FACEBOOK page and tell us about your friend. Or leave a comment on this blog.   We need others to walk alongside us and encourage us, just as God instructs. If you don’t have a close friend(s) that you can trust, God knows exactly who you need.  Pray for Him to send the right person along and whatever you do, DON’T WAIT!

Today I Cried

April 7, 2020 /

Written Sunday, April 5

I’ve been handling the tragedy that our world is facing pretty well.  I’ve been keeping positive, spending time with Jesus everyday, and simply trusting that He is in control.  But, today, I cried. I’m not a crier. I probably have a good cry MAYBE 5 times a year. It takes a lot to get me there and usually it’s hormones that push me over the edge.  Today, though, I had a cry that was not hormone-related and was several weeks coming.   

This morning, my husband and I got up early and arrived at Target right as it opened.  We knew that was the only way we’d get some of the items that we needed. The number of people in masks and gloves, the red circles that were 6 feet apart indicating where to stand at the check-out, the sneeze guards that are now between the cashier and the customer, and the weird dance we constantly had to do in order to reach products on the shelves without getting into other people’s 6 feet of personal space made me feel so heavy.  We then headed to Aldi which pushed me beyond what I thought I could handle. But, let me say this loud and clear. My faith still runs deep. I in no way doubt God or question His control. What I’m feeling, instead, is something that my Uncle Jim summed up perfectly in his comment on THIS blog post. I’m feeling sorrow.

Sorrow:  a feeling of deep distress caused by loss, disappointment, or other misfortune suffered by oneself or others. ~ dictionary.com

Read that definition again.  I think sorrow is something that every single person in the world has felt in the last few months.  I’m honestly not feeling sorrow for me. I’m feeling sorrow for the people of the world. Being out in public today brought all of the feelings deep within me to the surface and they emerged as soon as I sat down in my van.  My thoughts were a jumbled mess, so my husband took the extra long way home and listened as I sobbed and worked through all of my thoughts.  

Today I cried for all of the coronavirus victims that are in the hospital fighting for their lives all by themselves because their family members can’t stay with them.  I know a nurse who is working the front lines in a COVID hospital directly with patients who have the virus. She has talked about the fear in people’s eyes as they are being dropped off at the door.  These people are terrified as they have no idea what their next few days will hold and they have no family with them to comfort them.  

Today I cried for everyone who has had to drop a family member off at the hospital and couldn’t stay because of the risk of being infected themselves.  I can’t imagine dropping my mom, husband, or anyone else for that matter off at a hospital and then leaving. All I can think is, “God be with them.”

Today I cried for the people who have to die alone.  I’ve heard stories of families who have had to say goodbye through FaceTime or over the phone.  I truly have nothing else to say about that. It’s beyond heartbreaking. 

Today I cried for family members who can’t be with their loved ones during their final hours.  I had the privilege of being with my mother-in-law as she was transitioning from this life to heaven and there was no place I would have rather been.  Holding her hand and comforting her during her last hours did my heart so much good. It brought closure. I can’t imagine thinking of her dying alone.  So many people are not able to have this closure and the peace that comes from comforting their dying loved one during their final moments of life.

Today I cried for the people who have lost friends or family members (and not just from coronavirus) and are unable to grieve among family members due to social distancing. When we lose someone dear to us, the only tiny bit of comfort we are often able to find is within our family and friends who are experiencing the same emotions.  Being with loved ones who are also grieving brings a small sense of peace. I know of people who are currently grieving alone. Wives who have lost husbands, parents who have lost children, daughters who have lost fathers, sisters who have lost brothers. Can you imagine the loneliness and despair they must feel?   

Today I cried for the people who are having to watch the funerals of their loved one that lives states away over FaceTime and other platforms because unnecessary travel is forbidden.  There are funerals that are taking place with only a handful of people because groups of 10 or more are forbidden.  So much comfort can be found during visitations/wakes and funerals as people file through expressing their condolences and sharing fond memories and kind words about your loved one.  I can think of no greater way to honor someone’s life. But, that just isn’t possible at this time.

Today I cried for small business owners.  These people have put their heart and soul into their businesses.  They’ve invested their life savings into their companies. This is their livelihood and now they have no clue what will happen.  They’ve had to close shop and just hope and pray they can survive. They have family members and employees depending on them, but their hands are tied.   

Today I cried for the people who have lost their jobs or who will lose their jobs.  I have heard people continuously say they have been calling to apply for unemployment benefits for weeks, but they can’t get through because the Department of Labor’s system is overloaded.  I know we have a long road ahead of us and it’s going to take our economy a very long time to recover from this.  

Once my tears were dry, I began processing what had just happened.  “I really do trust you, God. Please don’t mistake my tears as mistrust.”  He gently reminded me of when Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. He had received word that his good friend Lazarus was sick and had died.  So, Jesus, along with his disciples, headed to Judea so that He could heal Lazarus and raise him back up. As He was getting closer to the tomb, Mary, the sister of Lazarus, ran out to meet Him.  She was crying, no doubt sobbing, as she fell at the feet of Jesus. When He saw Mary and the Jews that were with her crying, “he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled,” (John 11:33). Jesus then began to weep himself.  But why? He knew He was going to raise Lazarus from the dead. He cried because He felt sorrow for His friends. He experienced that deep distress caused by loss and misfortune. Even though He knew the outcome, He was moved deeply in His spirit and felt troubled.  As this story came to mind, I went to www.biblehub.com and looked at a commentary to find out more about why Jesus cried.  Barnes Notes on the Bible says this, “It is right, it is natural, it is indispensable for the Christian to sympathize with others in their afflictions. Romans 12:15; “rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.”  

If you are feeling sorrow during this time in our world’s history, do not feel bad about shedding tears.  Jesus himself did as He saw the grief that His friends were experiencing. On March 23, Max Lucado posted a simple sentence on his Facebook page.  It said this, “Grant yourself a good meltdown.” It’s ok to cry. It’s ok to feel sorrow. It does not show a lack of faith. It shows compassion, just as Jesus had.   Don’t Wait to let your emotions out. It’s normal. It’s biblical. It’s healing.

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