We are a vanishing mist.

Month: October 2020

Our Children Were Created For Such a Time as This

As parents living in this world that we are presently in, it is easy to be overtaken by fear.  Sin and depravity abound in our culture and it’s frightening to think what our children will face in the future.  Will they be able to worship God as they please or will they suffer persecution?  Will the darkness and sinful ideals of our culture overtake them?  Will they be able to stand up for truth or will they be squelched?  What exactly is the world going to look like when they are raising families of their own?

I was discussing these questions with a few friends recently and sharing with them how easy it is to let fear begin to creep in.  One of them reminded me of something that I have been holding onto ever since.  She said something like, “We have to remember that God chose our children to live in these times that we are now facing.”  First, let me point out how important it is to surround ourselves with like-minded friends.  They keep us grounded and pull us back in when our thinking gets out of whack.  Second, think about what she said.  Our children were CHOSEN to live in this period of time!  These times that we are living in are no surprise to God. So, we must never doubt that He will equip them and give them all that they need.  We cannot take our responsibility of training them lightly.

It is imperative that we pray over our children daily and using scripture as a guideline is the most powerful way to petition our Lord on their behalf.  In THIS POST I wrote about the benefits of praying Psalm 91 over our families.  I still pray this entire chapter several times a week as a request for spiritual protection over my husband and children.  I recently stumbled upon Romans 12 (which we know “stumbled” means the Holy Spirit led me to it) which I have found to be another great chapter to pray over my children.  I encourage you to take the time to read through this passage and ask God to give your children the strength to live as Paul encouraged the Christian churches in Rome to live.

Our prayers for our children should not merely be that they simply make it through life unscathed.  As Christians, our goal should not be to sit in our Christian bubble while silently serving God, so as not to draw any attention to ourselves.  On the contrary, we should pray that our children are more than conquerors (Romans 8:37); that they go into the world and preach the gospel to their friends, families, coworkers, and neighbors, (Mark 16:15); and that they go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. (Matthew 28:19).  

God keeps reminding me that we are living in an age where our children have to be spiritually strong.  Our freedoms are slowly being taken away and unless something changes, their generation will have to stand up for their faith more so than any of us in America have had to at this point.  They will need to be a light in the darkness and an example to those around them of the hope that comes only from Jesus.  As parents, this may be intimidating to think about as we do not know what opposition our children will encounter, but there are several promises that we need to keep in mind.

  1.  God put our children here.  Their lives did not come to be through happenstance.  “For you created my inmost being;  you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.”  (Psalm 139:13, 15).  The Creator of the universe not only intricately designed our children, but He also placed them here fully aware of what they would face in their lifetimes.
  1. God has a purpose for them.  “Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”  (Psalm 139:16)  God not only created our children in the depths of our womb, he also ordained their days.  Ephesians 2:10 says, “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”  I don’t know about you, but knowing that God has work prepared for my children to do brings me great peace.
  1. God will equip them.  When we teach our children God’s Word and encourage them to use the Bible as their main source for wisdom, they will be fully prepared for anything that comes their way.  “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”  The scriptures will strengthen them and provide them with everything that they need.
  1. God will be with them:  “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”  Matthew 28:19-20  We never have to worry about our children being alone as long as they are walking with Jesus.  He will be with them, guiding them and leading them in all of their ways. 
  1. God will give them wisdom:  “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” James 1:5  In any situation in life, our children will simply have to ask God for wisdom and He will give it to them.  

I can guarantee you that life will not be easy for our children, just as it is not for us.  Being a Christian does not make us exempt from heartache and pain.  But, we can have complete peace knowing that our children were created by God and he has ordained their days.  Don’t live in fear!  Teach your children that no matter how tough life is, God has put them here, has a purpose for their lives, will equip them, will be with them, and will give them wisdom if they just ask.  Remind them that the reward that they will have waiting if they stay connected to The Vine will be worth whatever hardship and persecution that they may face.  Tell Jesus that you need Him to guide YOU in this process because apart from Him, we can do NOTHING. (John 15:5).  Trust the Lord today with your children’s lives and futures.  And whatever you do, DON’T WAIT!!!

How Did We Get Here So Fast?

In August, our family went through a drastic change.  It was a change that we knew would one day come, but I don’t know how we got there so fast.   After living under our roof for 21 years, our oldest child moved out.  Having recently landed a full-time job at a local radio station as a production and technology coordinator, he decided it was time to branch out on his own.  

I don’t think there’s anything that can prepare a momma’s heart for such news.  I knew it was coming because the Lord had been preparing my heart.  This is what we raise our children to do, right?  They’re supposed to become responsible adults who can support themselves and be contributing members of society.  They’re intended to grow up, get full-time jobs, and move out on their own.  But, that doesn’t make it any easier.  

Here’s how it all came to be.  Back in February, I got a text from Solomon that said he needed to talk to his dad and me that night when he got off of work.  I immediately knew the exact reason that he wanted to chat with us.  “So, when are you moving out?” I quickly wrote back.  He ignored my text and went onto another subject.  I couldn’t let it go.  My mind began to race and I knew there was no way I could wait until that evening to hear what he had to say.  I probably shouldn’t have, but I asked again.  “You ignored my question.  When are you moving out?”  My phone rang right away and he asked, laughing, “How do you always figure these things out?”  I reminded him that there’s not much that can be pulled over on a mother.

Later that afternoon, I was walking through Target and passed a lady who was walking with her preschool-age son.  I immediately went back in my mind to the days before our 2nd child was born when it was just me and Solomon running errands together while my husband worked.  Instantly I saw his chubby little face and rosy cheeks as he walked beside me with his blankie draped over his shoulder, thumb in his mouth, and his tiny hand in mine.  I admit I followed behind this mother and son for a bit while the memories came flooding back, all the while wanting to tell her to soak in every minute because these days would soon be gone.  But, as tears began to sting my eyes, I decided it was best to let her be.  I knew I would be a blubbering mess if I tried to speak.

I am thankful that I had 6 months to prepare myself for Solomon’s big move (which wasn’t exactly a “big” move because everything that he owned fit in his Chevy Trailblazer, but it was a big day for our family as a whole).  I became accustomed to the idea and felt more and more peace as the day approached.  On the morning of his move, I was sitting at my desk journaling as I worked through my feelings and emotions.  I looked up and saw my sweet neighbor, Sue, walking down the sidewalk.  Sue is the mother of 6 grown children, and I know that God sent her past my house at that exact moment because I needed to see her.  I instantly felt peace wash over me and I was even able to smile as I thought, “Sue has done this six times.  I can do it, too.”

As I continued to sit there that morning, I was also reminded of Mary, the mother of Jesus.  I was in pain because my son was moving out, but can you imagine the pain she felt as she watched her son being beaten and crucified?  Think of how she felt as she watched Him take His last breath while He hung innocently on a cross.  I can think of no worse pain than to watch your child suffer, especially when it’s totally out of your hands.  Mary’s son was brutally murdered as people watched and cheered.  And though He rose again, He would no longer be physically with her in human form as He had been in the past.  Yes, I’m sure she understood that He fulfilled the greatest of purposes, but Mary was still a human who experienced the same emotions that we feel.  I’m sure she missed Jesus immensely.  This definitely put things in perspective for me.  

I’ve surprisingly handled this bittersweet change well.  There were lots of tears shed on the day Solomon moved, but since then I’ve been ok.  I definitely have days when I miss him terribly, but I’m able to remind myself that this is healthy.  I’m insanely proud of him and it’s been rewarding to watch him thrive on his own.  

I’m writing about this adjustment in our life to remind you that the days with your children at home and under your roof will be over in the blink of an eye.  These days are precious and are fleeting.  We had 7,764 days with Solomon and I still cannot believe how fast it went.  The morning of his move, I was standing in the kitchen crying with my husband and all I could say was, “How did we get here so fast?”  So, I encourage you, let the idea of having an immaculate house go.  The organization of your linen closet, a sink that is never full of dirty dishes, and the latest post by your friends on Facebook do not matter.

“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”  ~  Matthew 6:19-20

Your child’s heart and soul are what really matter and these are some of the heavenly treasures you should be storing up, not the “treasures” of this world.  When you stand before God one day, He will not ask you how clean your house was or how much money you had in your bank account.  Those things will pass away.  But, what will really matter will be the souls that you have touched and sown into and your children should be number one on that list.

Four of my greatest treasures

“Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.” ~ James 4:14

Take it from me, you do not have an infinite number of days with your children.  Not only do they grow up, get jobs, and move away, we have no idea how many days we have left here on earth.  This life is but a mist and goes by fast.  You can’t put off making memories with your children or teaching them what it means to be a disciple of Christ.  One day they will be out in the “real world” and your direct influence over them will be a thing of the past.  Make the most of the days you have with them because these days are flying by. And whatever you do, DON’T WAIT!!! 

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